Transcript for Ch-ch-ch-Change Day
Narrator: One fine day at the Botsford home…
(Scene: The Botsford living room. TJ is doing a magic trick for Becky and Bob. Becky looks moderately unimpressed.)
TJ: Ladies and Gentlemen, as you can see, I hold in my amazing hand an ordinary coin. Mr. Coin, we have never met before, correct?
(TJ moves the coin from side to side with his fingers, as if it were saying no.)
TJ: Thank you. Now, Bob, if you will say the magic word--
(Bob chatters enthusiastically. TJ spreads his arms and opens his palms to show that the coin is gone. Bob frantically jumps off the couch.)
Becky: (giving him a thumbs up) Good trick, TJ. Where's the coin?
TJ: If Bob will stop fidgeting, I'll show you where the coin is. The coin was in Bob's ear!
(Bob freaks out and runs around the room.)
Becky: Bob, Bob, don't worry. It was just a trick.
TJ: That's right. Because the coin is in Becky's ear.
Becky: TJ, that's the same coin you pulled out of Bob's ear.
TJ: Is it, Becky? Is it?
Mr. Botsford: Okay, penny-pinchers! Let's get our coins counted, stacked and rolled. Today is loose change day at the National National Bank.
Becky: Why does the bank care about our coins, anyway? It's not very much money.
Mr. Botsford: Well Becky, loose change day is a way for the bank to teach young people how saving a little money can add up to a lot of money over time.
Becky: I don't know, it's kind of a quandary. I would like to save enough money to buy a Pretty Princess bike, but I also like to have my money close by so I can see it whenever I want.
(TJ continues to do coin tricks with Becky, such as producing a coin from her nose.)
Mr. Botsford: Well Becky, maybe this will help you with your quandary. Every person who makes a bank deposit gets a free WordGirl coin purse slash key chain!
Becky: Oh… I guess I wouldn't mind having one…
(TJ rushes off and comes back with his piggy bank and a mallet.)
TJ: A WordGirl coin purse slash key chain?! Bank, here we come!
(He smashes the piggy bank.)
Narrator: Later, at the National National Bank, Becky aka WordGirl is really, really bored, because she and her family have to stand in a very long line.
(Scene: at the bank. A line stretches out from well beyond the entrance. Inside, Becky, Tj, Bob and Mr. Botsford are standing in line. Mr. Botsford has a hand cart filled with rolls of coins, which TJ is resting against. Becky is holding a Magic Pony bank, and Bob is eating from a stack of foil-wrapped coin-shaped chocolates.)
Becky: Thanks for telling us.
Narrator: Not a problem.
TJ: It looks like Bob can make coins disappear, too! As long as it's made of chocolate.
(Becky and TJ laugh.)
Mr. Botsford: (elbowing the man standing behind them in line) Yeah, that's what I call putting your money where your mouth is! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
(As he laughs at his own joke, a large hand reaches out and grabs the man behind them and shoves him back. The Butcher, wearing a large fake mustache, takes the man's place behind Mr. Botsford.)
Butcher: (Looking up and reading a sign) What? Loose change day? Oh, man! Of all the days to rob a bank!
Mr. Botsford: I'm sorry, were you talking to me?
Butcher: Uh, yeah, I was just sayin', I picked a bad day to-- uh, cash my, uh, meat tax rebate check.
Mr. Botsford: Oh, I know exactly how you feel, friend. Long lines can really make me fidget. (laughs) But luckily, I never go to the bank without my trusty banking survival kit. (He holds up a white metal case and opens it.) Duh-tah-dah! I added the song, it's not part of the name. Let's see, what do we have in here? Ah, yes! Here we go. "Fun coin facts that will help pass the time while you wait in a long bank line." Hmm… seems appropriate enough. (laughs) Let's see here-- "what kind of metal is used to make a nickel?"
Butcher: (thinking) Wood?
Mr. Botsford: What?! (chuckles) No, no, wood isn't a metal. A nickel is made of a metal called-- nickel. (laughs again)
Butcher: Huh. I was not aware of that fact. How about bologna, any bologna in there?
Mr. Botsford: Hmm, as far as I know, the nickel is mostly nickel. No bologna.
Becky: (to Bob) Hey Bob, do you recognize that man?
(Bob makes a sound, then goes back to eating his gold chocolate cookies.)
Becky: I know that I know him, but I don't know from where.
Mr. Botsford: And did you know, that the word "dime" comes from the Latin word decima, which means tenth part?
Butcher: Oh, yeah, that's uh… interesting, yeah.
(The fake mustache begins to slip off.)
Mr. Botsford: I know! Oh, uh, pardon me sir, but your fake mustache appears to be slipping.
Butcher: (adjusting it) Oh! Uh, heh heh, thanks for that, uh…
Becky: Excuse me sir, you seem to be really fidgety. Is something wrong?
Butcher: Uh, well, if I knew what fidgety meant, then maybe I could answer your question. (He continues to fix his mustache.)
Becky: To fidget means to make small movements with your hands or feet when you're feeling nervous. You know, to be kind of… wiggly.
Butcher: Okay, I was fidgeting because I'm in a hurry, and I don't like waiting in a long line!
(The mustache finally falls off.)
Becky: (gasps) I DO know you! You're the Butcher!
(He runs to the front of the line. A man sets down a piggy bank in front of the teller.)
Man: Okay, there's my deposit.
Male Bank Teller: Thank you very much, and here's your WordGirl coin purse slash key chain.
Man: Oh, yes! My very own WordGirl coin purse slash key ch--
(The Butcher grabs the man by the head and shoves him back, then walks up cheerfully to the teller. The other man storms back up to the Butcher.)
Man: Hey, buddy! (pause) You're lucky I don't know karate.
(The Butcher launches a meat product from his hand, knocking the man back.)
Butcher: (to teller) Pardon my impoliteness, kind sir. But I have important business!
(He hands a piece of paper to the teller, who begins reading it.)
Male Bank Teller: "To home it may confirm… this is a hold-up." I presume you mean to whom it may concern? It's a standard business letter greeting.
Butcher: This is a robbery! Now give me all your money. That's a standard bank robber greeting! Nyah! (He sticks out his tongue at the teller)
Male Bank Teller: Oh. So this is a robbery.
Butcher: There you go. Oh yeah, and throw in one of those key chains.
(The teller hands one to Butcher, and he eagerly looks at it.)
Butcher: Oh, this thing's a coin purse too?
(The alarm goes off.)
Butcher: Aw, come on! You didn't read the P.S. part of the note!
Male Bank Teller: (looks further down) Okay. P.S., no alarms. Hmm, I really have a quandary. Our rules say I have to press the alarm when we're being robbed, but you say you don't want me to, and at National National Bank we really care about our customers' wishes.
Butcher: Oh! So, you'll turn off the alarm?
Male Bank Teller: No.
(Becky has been watching this exchange from the line.)
Becky: (talking quietly to Bob) Come on, Bob. We have to stop him! Word--
(She looks around and realizes there are still other people around.)
Becky: (still talking to Bob) Ooh, wait… we need a place to change.
(Bob holds up the Magic Pony bank.)
Becky: No Bob, not that kind of change. We need to change into WordGirl and Captain Huggy Face.
(They hear sirens outside. Many police cars pull up in front of the bank. A female officer comes in and runs past Becky and Bob.)
Butcher: WIENER SCHNITZEL SHACKLES!
(He launches a meat attack on the officer. It wraps around her, restraining her arms. Another officer runs toward the door of the bank.)
Butcher: (inaudible) BARRICADE!
(His attack piles meat in front of the door, blocking the other officers from entering.)
Butcher: Alright, everyone into the vault! Let's go! Come on now, in you go. Let's go!
(The other customers hand their piggy banks to Butcher and go into the vault. Becky and Bob try to quietly slip away.)
Butcher: Hey, you too, little girl! And bring that pet beaver in with you! Let's go!
(Reluctantly they head into the vault, joining the others.)
Butcher: Alright, now somebody will come let you out after I make my getaway. Don't worry.
(He closes the vault door, leaving them in darkness. A few seconds later, one of the bank tellers pulls a chain on the ceiling which turns on an overhead bulb. Becky and Bob had started changing into their costumes while in the dark, but quickly stop when the light comes on.)
Mr. Botsford: Wow, the bank's vault! See, kids? Here's where they keep all the money. We sure are getting our money's worth out of this visit to the bank.
TJ: (giggling) Money's worth. Good one, Dad!
Mr. Botsford: Oh, hahahaha! I don't get it. (looks down at Becky) Hey, what's with all the fidgeting, Becky?
Becky: Well, the Butcher is out there robbing the bank, and we can't do anything to stop him because we're stuck in a bank vault!
TJ: There's nothing to worry about. WordGirl will save us! (Holds up his WordGirl action figure)
Becky: (whispering to Bob) Not if I'm stuck in a vault and can't transform!
TJ: What's that, Becky?
Mr. Botsford: Ta-da! While we're waiting for WordGirl to show up and save the day, let's learn some more coin facts! Okay. Did you know the first coins were used over 2500 years ago in a place called Lydia, which is now in Turkey? Whoa! Huh?
TJ: Don't worry, Dad. I brought my own banking survival kit. Now who likes coin tricks?
Mr. Botsford: Yeah!
(Everyone watches TJ with interest. Bob hides behind Becky.)
Becky: Well, maybe the police can save the day.
(Scene: outside the bank, one officer hands a cup of coffee to another.)
Deputy: Hey Sarge, what do we do now?
Sergeant: Usually WordGirl shows up and saves the day by now. But, I'm the police sergeant. So, I should probably do something. Problem is, I don't know what.
Deputy: Wow, that's quite a quandary. (looks down at the megaphone) Maybe you should talk into that thing.
Sergeant: Yeah. Good idea. (raises it to his lips) Okay, Butcher. We have you surrounded.
Butcher: (from inside) Yeah? So?
Sergeant: Oh… uh, well, you better come out now.
Butcher: (from inside) Or what?
Sergeant: Or I'll… (pause) ...ask you to come out again.
(He moves the megaphone away from his mouth to talk to the other officer, but forgets to turn it off.)
Sergeant: Gee, when is WordGirl going to get here?
Deputy: Um, Sarge? Your finger's still on the talk button.
Sergeant: Whoops! Okay, Butcher. Forget that last thing I said. The part about WordGirl. I was nervous and fidgety. Forgot to take my finger off the talk button.
Butcher: (from inside) Yeah, don't worry about it! I've been fidgety lately too.
Sergeant: Understanding villain.
Deputy: Yeah. This business has taught me that most villains aren't ALL bad.
Sergeant: Interesting theory, deputy. But if it's true, does that mean we're not all good?
Deputy: Is your finger still off that talk button?
(They both laugh.)
Narrator: Meanwhile, inside the bank vault…
(TJ is still entertaining the others with his coin tricks. Becky is pacing around frantically while grabbing her hair, and Bob follows her around.)
Becky: Oh, what should I do? I'm in an awful quandary, Bob.
(Bob chatters at her.)
Becky: Oh, a person is in a quandary when they have to make a hard decision about something and they don't know what they should do. Like in this situation. If I decide to turn into WordGirl and stop the Butcher, everyone will know my secret identity! But if I don't, we're all going to be stuck in here and the Butcher is going to get away.
(Bob chatters at her again.)
Becky: I think you're right, Bob. We have no choice. I guess everyone will finally know who we really are. (Takes a deep breath) Well, here we go--
(She puts her fingers to her chest and begins to say "Word Up". Before she can do so, she is interrupted by Mr. Botsford.)
Mr. Botsford: Great TJ's ghost! You're making that coin float in mid-air!
TJ: Am I, Dad? (The coin is obviously attached to a string which is tied to his finger. Despite this, everyone applauds.)
Male Bank Teller: That kid is fabulous!
Becky: That's it, I've got it! TJ, you and Dad are going to resolve our quandary!
(In the front of the bank, the Butcher has filled his bag with coins collected from the customers and from the teller's stations. He holds it up and shakes it.)
Butcher: Music to my ears! Heh heh heh!
(He stops as he hears the customers reacting excitedly inside the vault )
Butcher: Huh? Hey, what's goin' on in there?
Becky: There's a magic boy in here who can make money appear out of people's ears!
Butcher: (chuckling to himself) Yeah, right. (After a brief pause) Really?
Mr. Botsford: Yeah-- wow! You should come in here and see this for yourself, person out there.
Butcher: Huh. You know, I could use a friend who makes money come out of my ears. That'd be a real time saver.
(The Butcher comes into the vault, and TJ shows him his trick.)
Butcher: Wow, that's amazing!
(Becky and Bob use the opportunity to move out of the way.)
Butcher: Now show me how you can make money come out of my ear!
(The Butcher leans in toward TJ, and TJ does the trick on him.)
Butcher: Whoa! How'd you do that? Maybe there's more in there, do it again, do it again!
Becky: (offscreen) Word UP!
Butcher: (to TJ) You do impressions too??
WordGirl: Sorry Butcher, that was MY little trick!
Butcher and TJ: (together) WordGirl!
Mr. Botsford: Thank goodness you're here!
Male Bank Teller: Yeah, what took you so long?
WordGirl: Yeah, well, I was stuck somewhere.
Butcher: Oh yeah? Well, I hope you remembered to bring your appetite! BEEF BOUILLON BLITZ!
(WordGirl moves out of the way. Huggy catches all of the bouillon cubes in his mouth, and spits out a large cube.)
Butcher: Not a bouillon fan, eh? Well, how about this? (inaudible) TYPHOON!
(Huggy eats all of the sausages.)
TJ: Hey Butcher, want to see a magic trick?
(The Butcher nods.)
TJ: Watch me catch all these coins in one hand.
(TJ has a stack of coins balanced on one of his elbows.)
Butcher: Nah, you'll never be able to do that.
TJ: Oh yeah? Wanna bet?
Butcher: Uh, a gentleman's bet. I don't believe in gambling.
(TJ flips the coins in the air and tries to catch them, but he misses most of them. The bank teller gives him an angry look.)
Butcher: Ha! Now that's what you call throwing money around.
TJ: Wish I'd said that.
(WordGirl carries the bag of coins above Butcher's head, and lets the contents fall out onto Butcher. He emerges from the pile with coins in his eyes, waving a small white flag.)
WordGirl: This is what I call throwing money around!
Narrator: Good one! Sort of.
(Scene: The National National Bank. Customers are lined up outside the door. Mr. Botsford walks up to the teller window with his "bank survival kit.")
Male Bank Teller: I can help you over here. Can I have your deposit slip and bank book, please?
Mr. Botsford: Sure thing, allow me to get it out of my trusty banking survival kit.
(He pulls a fish out of the box, and throws it aside. Next he pulls out a pitcher of coffee and sets it down. The man behind him in line gives him a dirty look.)
Mr. Botsford: Okay, where is it? (He pulls out some game and throws it down.) Sweet salt water taffy, where is my bank book? Ha, now I'm that guy at the front of the line who's not ready, I'm sorry everybody. Ha-ha-ha. (He pulls out a picture of the mayor.) I'm just now putting on my-- it's not in here. Haaaa….
Narrator: And so, as loose change day resumes in full swing, Mr. Botsford finds himself in another quandary. But if you're looking for more nonstop action and fidgety fun, then join us next time for another exciting episode of WordGirl!
(In the final scene, WordGirl flies in scene in front of the bank wearing a magician's hat. She holds it upside-down in front of her, and Huggy emerges from the hat.)