Can't Touch This/Transcript

AHHH, THE WONDER AND BEAUTY OF THE FOREST! WHERE THE BOTSFORD FAMILY TRIES TO ENJOY THE TRANQUILITY OF NATURE...

TJ yells MOM! BECKY WON'T SHARE ANY OF HER WATER!

He grabs Becky’s canteen and drinks deeply

Becky groans EW, TJ!

Mrs. Botsford turns around and exclaims KIDS, WOW! WHAT IF WE HAD LESS ARGUING SOUNDS AND MORE NATURE SOUNDS?

Becky is annoyed and says BUT, MOM, TJ JUST SLOBBERED ALL OVER MY CANTEEN!

TJ says BECKY, IT'S CALLED TAKING A DRINK.

Mr. Botsford says OKAY, THAT'S ENOUGH. YOU GUYS NEED TO STOP BICKERING AND START LOOKING AROUND YOU! WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FOREST!

He exclaims THE POWER, THE MAJESTY OF NATURE!

[electronic beeps and boops] TJ leans over a carrot shaped hand-held game

Mr. Botsford says TJ, SERIOUSLY?

TJ says DAD, THEY MAKE THESE THINGS PORTABLE FOR A REASON.

Becky says WAIT, IS THAT MY VEGETABLE WARRIOR GAME?

TJ nods and says UH-HUH.

Becky says WHO SAID YOU CAN GO IN MY ROOM AND TAKE MY PERSONAL PROPERTY?!

TJ says BECKY, I MADE SURE YOU WEREN'T IN YOUR ROOM WHEN I TOOK IT.

Becky screams AHH! STOP TOUCHING STUFF THAT DOESN'T BELONG TO YOU!

TJ says STOP HOGGING STUFF THAT DOES BELONG TO YOU! [frustrated cry]

The family is in the middle of two paths

Mr. Botsford says HMM... THAT'S STRANGE. IN MY EXPERIENCE, TREES GENERALLY GROW THIS WAY, AND NOT THIS WAY.

Mrs. Botsford says HMM! I GUESS WE'LL JUST HAVE TO HIKE AROUND IT.

Bob makes chirping noises

Becky says WHAT, BOB, WHAT?

Bob shrieks and points to Word Girl’s rocket in the distance [dramatic music]

Beckly looks alarmed and says THAT'S WHAT.

She stammers UH, HEY, GUYS, LET'S GO BACK THIS WAY. OVER HERE, HUH?

Mr. Botsford says WHY? THIS WAY SEEMS SUPER SPECTACULAR. I CAN EVEN SEE THE PERFECT ROCK FOR MY ROCK COLLECTION! WOO-HOO!

They continue onwards

Becky cries out OH, NO! WAIT! [Music Plays]

TJ drops the vegetable warrior game and exclaims WHOA, LOOK! IT'S WORD GIRL'S SUPER SECRET SPACESHIP HIDEOUT!

Becky chuckles and says WHAT? THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE! IT'S PROBABLY SOMEONE ELSE'S TOTALLY BORING NORMAL SPACESHIP THAT'S NOT EVEN WORTH LOOKING AT.

TJ says OH, NO! AS WORD GIRL'S NUMBER ONE FAN, I KNOW IN MY HEART THAT THAT IS WORD GIRL'S SUPER SECRET SPACESHIP HIDEOUT!

Becky says WELL, ON THE OFF CHANCE THAT IT IS WORD GIRL'S SECRET HIDEOUT, IT'S CALLED A SECRET HIDEOUT FOR A REASON. SHE DOESN'T WANT ANYONE IN IT, YOU GUYS.

TJ says MAYBE. BUT I'M SURE SHE'D MAKE AN EXCEPTION FOR HER NUMBER ONE FAN, TJ BOTSFORD!

Becky says YEAH, WELL, I'M SURE THAT WORD GIRL WOULD WANT US TO RESPECT HER PERSONAL PROPERTY AND JUST LEAVE IT ALONE!

TJ says HUH

He jumps down into the pit and says SPACESHIPS ARE AWESOME!

Becky yells TJ! [Music Plays]

TJ jumps into the ship and starts running around all the rooms

TJ shouts AHHHH! HEY, LOOK AT THAT.

Becky chases after him yelling NO, NO, NO, DON'T LOOK AT THAT! [Music Plays]

TJ holds up a statue and exclaims WHOA, WHAT'S OVER THERE?!

Becky exclaims NO, NOTHING, NOTHING'S OVER THERE!

TJ runs through the deck yelling THIS IS AWESOME.

A stressed out Becky yells STOP TOUCHING STUFF!

TJ exclaims COOL, CHECK THAT OUT.

Bob shrieks while Becky yells PLEASE DON'T BREAK THAT!

Mrs. Botsford says TJ, YOU REALLY SHOULDN'T BE TOUCHING WORD GIRL'S PERSONAL PROPERTY.

TJ sighs AW, BUT MOM!

Mrs. Botsford says BUP BUP BUP! PUT EVERYTHING BACK THE WAY YOU FOUND IT.

Mr. Botsford says IT'S JUST NOT RIGHT TO BARGE INTO SOMEONE'S SECRET HIDEOUT AND TINKER WITH ALL THEIR STUFF WITHOUT THEIR PERMISSION.

Becky says I TOTALLY AGREE!

Mr. Botsford says SO, I SAY WE STAND OVER HERE IN THE CORNER AND WAIT FOR WORD GIRL.

Becky says YES, THAT'S A - WAIT, WHAT?

Mrs. Botsford says GREAT IDEA, HON!

Mr. Botsford, Mrs. Botsford and TJ walk into a corner

Mrs. Botsford says THIS WAY, WHEN SHE COMES BACK, WE CAN ASK HER FOR PERMISSION TO TINKER WITH HER STUFF! [Music Plays]

Becky says UH, NO, GUYS, I DON'T THINK WE SHOULD -

Whammer shouts WHAM! WHAM!

Becky whispers OH NO, IT'S THE WHAMMER! BUT I CAN'T JUST LEAVE MY FAMILY HERE WAITING FOR WORD GIRL!

Bob makes monkey noises

Becky turns to Bob and whispers OKAY, BOB, HERE'S THE PLAN. YOU STAY HERE AND MAKE SURE TJ DOESN'T START TINKERING WITH MY STUFF AGAIN.

She turns towards TJ and shouts NOT YOUR PROPERTY!

TJ yells back I WASN'T TOUCHING IT!

Becky looks at Bob and whispers THINK YOU CAN HANDLE IT?

Bob looks unconvinced

Without missing a beat Becky says THAT'S THE SPIRIT!

She calls out to her family HEY, GUYS, I'M GOING TO STEP OUTSIDE FOR A LITTLE AIR. DON'T TOUCH ANYTHING 'TIL I GET BACK! UHH... IS WHAT I THINK WORD GIRL MIGHT SAY, IF SHE WAS HERE... WHICH SHE'S NOT... YEP. I'LL BE OUTSIDE.

She hurries out and exclaims WORD UP!

TJ says I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE THIS SPACESHIP.

The Narrator says MOMENTS LATER, IN ANOTHER PART OF THE WOODS, THE PEACEFUL SOUNDS OF NATURE... [Music Plays]

Whammer says WHAAAAM!

A frightened squirrel scurries up a tree carrying a sandwich

The Narrator says ARE BEING RUINED, YET AGAIN, BY THE WHAMMER. WHO IS, AS FAR AS I CAN TELL, WHAMMING STUFF.

Whammer hangs from the top of the tree. He is wearing a blue shirt, purple mask, purple gloves, and Viking helmet. The squirrel recoils in free

Word Girl flies up to the tree and says WHAMMER! STOP WHAMMING TREES! YOU'RE WRECKING THE FOREST!

Whammer says WHAMMER'S NOT WHAMMING TREES, WORD GIRL. WHAMMER'S WHAMMING SQUIRRELS, WHAM!

He slaps his fists together and blasts the bottom of the tree. The squirrel jumps out of the way. The tree falls over and Whammer to tumble out [Music Plays]

Word Girl catches Whammer and lands safely on the ground

She says WHAMMING SQUIRRELS IS NOT AT ALL BETTER THAN WHAMMING TREES.

Whammer says BUT WHAMMER WAS TOTALLY WHAMMING A WHAM AND CHEESE WHAMWICH IN THE PARK WHEN A SQUIRREL WHAMMED UP AND WHAMMED IT! WHAM!

He whams another tree causing it to fall down

Word Girl says WHAMMER, STOP! THESE TREES ARE NOT YOUR PROPERTY!

Whammer says PROPER-TREE?

Word Girl says NO, PROPER-TY. IT MEANS SOMETHING THAT BELONGS TO YOU, STUFF THAT YOU OWN, YOUR POSSESSIONS.

She pulls out a sparkly purple notebook and says LIKE HOW THIS IS MY PRETTY PRINCESS NOTEBOOK. IT BELONGS TO ME, SO IT'S MY PROPERTY. AND THOSE BOOTS THAT YOU'RE WEARING, THEY'RE YOUR PROPERTY. THOSE TREES, HOWEVER, ARE NOT YOUR PROPERTY, SO YOU SHOULD LEAVE THEM ALONE!

Whammer grumbles HUH... BUT THE WHAMWICH WAS THE WHAMMER'S PROPERTY AND THE SQUIRREL TOOK IT. SO, ISN'T THE SQUIRREL THE ONE WHO'S IN THE WRONG? WHAM?

Word Girl says YEAH, WELL, IT'S... ACTUALLY, YOU KINDA HAVE A POINT.

Whammer points towards Word Girl’s ship and says WHAMMER SAW THE SQUIRREL WHAM THAT WAY! [Music Plays]

Word Girl shouts WHAT?! NO, NO, IT DIDN'T!

Whammer walks towards the ship but Word Girl blocks his path

She points in the opposite direction and says I THINK IT WENT OVER THERE. [Music Plays]

Whammer says NO! WHAMMER'S PRETTY SURE THE SQUIRREL WHAMMED OVER THERE. IS WORD GIRL WHAMMING SOMETHING?

Word Girl raises her voice and says NO, I'M NOT HIDING SOMETHING!

Whammer says 'CAUSE IT REALLY SEEMS THAT WORD GIRL IS -

Word Girl says SQUIRREL WITH A SANDWICH, BEHIND YOU!

Whammer turns around and shouts WHAM! [Music Plays]

Word Girl says AW, YOU MISSED! BUT HE WENT THAT WAY! GO GET HIM!

Whammer asks WHY DOESN'T WORD GIRL WANT WHAMMER TO WHAM OVER THERE?

Word Girl says WHAT?! NO! AHH, DON'T! [Music Plays]

Whammer pushes Word Girl to the side and says WHAT'S THE DEAL? IT'S JUST A SPACESHIP. WITH THE WHAM-XACT SAME COLOURS THAT WORD GIRL HAS. AND A STAR? WAIT A SECOND!

Word Girl says OH, NO...

Whammer says WORD GIRL, THAT'S YOUR SECRET SPACE-WHAM HIDEOUT!

Word Girl says NO, NO! NOW, WAIT.

Whammer muses WAIT 'TIL I WHAM ALL THE OTHER VILLAINS ABOUT THIS, ABOUT THIS!

Word Girl says OH NO, NO, NO, NO, YOU DON'T! YOU'RE NOT GOING -

Whammer points his fists at World Girl and says WHAM!

Word Girl falls down screaming AAAAAAAH! GREAT.

A moment later, World Girl appears in her spaceship. She lands in front of Bob who is eating a bucket of popcorn

She says HUGGY, WE NEED TO FIND A - OH, RIGHT!

She notices her family standing in the corner and says UH, HELLO... BOTSFORDS, IS IT? RIGHT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY SECRET HIDEOUT?

The Botsfords turn around and wave

TJ says HI, WORD GIRL! WE'RE JUST WAITING FOR PERMISSION TO PLAY WITH ALL YOUR STUFF.

Word Girl says WHY DO YOU WANT TO TINKER WITH MY STUFF?

TJ says WE DON'T WANT TO TINKER WITH IT! WE WANT TO PLAY WITH IT!

Word Girl says WELL, ACTUALLY, THAT'S WHAT TINKER MEANS. IT MEANS TO PLAY AROUND WITH OR FIDDLE WITH OR TRY DIFFERENT THINGS WITH SOMETHING.

TJ exclaims WHOA, DID I JUST SEE WORD GIRL DEFINE A WORD IN HER OWN SECRET SPACESHIP HIDEOUT? I'M NEVER WASHING MY EYES AND EARS AGAIN!

Mr. Botsford says SPECIAL DAY. SPECIAL, SPECIAL DAY.

Word Girl says OKAY, SO, LISTEN. I HAVE A PROBLEM, AND SINCE I USUALLY TALK THROUGH MY PROBLEMS WITH MY MONKEY FRIEND CAPTAIN HUGGY FACE - AND HE ISN'T HERE RIGHT NOW - WOULD YOU MIND IF I TALK TO YOUR MONKEY FRIEND?

They turn around facing the wall

Mr. Botsford says OH, GO RIGHT AHEAD!

Mrs. Botsford says I SUPPOSE THERE ARE SOME PROBLEMS THAT JUST CAN'T BE SOLVED WITHOUT A MONKEY. RIGHT, BOB?

Word Girl says RIGHT!

She looks at Bob and says SO, UH, FOLLOW ME BOB, WAS IT?

As they walk down a coordinar TJ says OH, CAN WE TINKER WITH YOUR STUFF WHILE YOU'RE -

Word Girl shouts NO.

TJ says ALL RIGHTY!

Word Girl looks at Bob and says WE'VE GOT TO DO SOMETHING! THE WHAMMER FOUND OUR SPACESHIP HIDEOUT, THEN TOOK OFF TO TELL EVERY VILLAIN IN THE CITY!

Bob shrieks

TJ says WORD GIRL? NOW, CAN I TINKER WITH YOUR -

Word Girl says NO!

TJ says OKAY!

Word Girl says BOB, DO YOU THINK YOU CAN GET THE SPACESHIP UP AND RUNNING?

Bob raises his hands and makes monkey sounds.

Word Girl says I KNOW IT'S BROKEN, BUT WE'VE GOTTA DO SOMETHING!

Bob makes monkey sounds.

Word Girl says GREAT IDEA! YOU TINKER WITH THE CONTROL PANEL AND TRY TO GET THE ENGINES RUNNING LONG ENOUGH TO MOVE THE SPACESHIP. [distant whamming]

She cries OH NO, THAT'S THE WHAMMER! HURRY, BOB! I'LL GO DISTRACT THEM!

TJ says CAN WE -

Word Girl shouts NO!

TJ says FAIR ENOUGH.

Word Girl flies off.

The scene changes to Word Girl’s villains walking in the forest towards her spaceship

Henchman says HOW MUCH LONGER DO WE HAVE TO WALK, BOSS?

Dr. Two-Brains says I DON'T KNOW. ASK HELMET GUY. IT'S HIS PARTY. [Music Plays]

Whammer says WE JUST HAVE TO WHAM A LITTLE FURTHER.

Word Girl hovers above the villains and says GAH!

Whammer says A-HA, WORD GIRL! SEE?

Leslie in her red suit mutters BUT THAT'S JUST WORD GIRL.

Henchman says YEAH, WE SEE HER ALL THE TIME.

Dr. Two-Brains says RIGHT! WHERE'S HER HIDEOUT?

Word Girl says HIDEOUT? HA, I DON'T HAVE A HIDEOUT! I MEAN...

Whammer says WHAM! WHAMMER SAW IT WITH HIS OWN TWO WHAMS!

Word Girl says SORRY, WHAMMER. I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE WHAMMING ABOUT.

Whammer says HUH?!

Inside the spaceship Bob flicks on switches, turns on the engine and gets ready for take off An image shows the Botsford family trying to keep from falling over as the spaceship shakes

Mr. Botsford says GETTING A LITTLE BUMPY BACK HERE, BOB!

Mrs. Botsford says RIGHT NOW, I COULD USE A DEFINITION FOR THE WORD DIZZY! [chuckling]

Huggy makes monkey sounds [Music Plays]

Outside the spaceship, Whammer says NO, WHAMMER'S POSITIVE THAT THE SPACESHIP HIDEOUT IS CLOSE BY. IN FACT, I THINK IT'S WHAM BEHIND THOSE BUSHES!

Word Girl says WHAT?! THERE'S NO -

Whammer aims at Word Girl and shouts WHAM!

Word Girl says GAH!

She falls down into the hole

Whammer says WHAM! [worried yelp] [Music Plays]

He looks down where Word Girl fell and says HEY, WHAM?

There is nothing in the hole

Dr. Two-Brains says YOU MEAN TO TELL ME YOU INTERRUPTED MY MANI-PEDI FOR A VAGUELY SPACESHIP-SHAPED HOLE IN THE GROUND?

Whammer shouts NO! WHAMMER SAW THE HIDEOUT! IT WAS RIGHT HERE!

Dr. Two-Brains says YEAH, WELL, NEXT TIME YOU FIND WORD GIRL'S "SUPER SECRET SPACESHIP HIDEOUT," DO US A FAVOUR: KEEP IT A SECRET, OKAY?

The villains walk away

Whammer says BUT HONESTLY, WHAMMER SAW IT! WHAMMER SAW IT! WHAMMER WOULDN'T WHAM YOU GUYS, HONEST!

Dr. Two-Brains says BYE. [Music Plays]

Whammer says OHHH, NOT THE WHAMMER'S DAY. [Music Plays]

The spaceship hovers in the distance

Word Girl flies inside the spaceship and exclaims HUGGY

She grabs Huggy, notices the Botsfords, pauses for a moment and then shouts BOB! HUG FOR BOB! BOB IS YOUR NAME! YEAH, YOU SAVED THE DAY!

Bob makes monkey noises

TJ says OKAY, SO NOW DO WE HAVE PERMISSION TO TINKER WITH SOME OF YOUR STUFF?

Mrs. Botsford says WE DID KIND OF EARN IT. ALSO, DO YOU HAVE A RESTROOM?

Word Girl says OKAY, OKAY, FINE. YOU CAN TOUCH ONE PIECE OF MY PROPERTY.

TJ says ALL RIGHT!

Word Girl says RESTROOM'S OUTSIDE.

Mr. and Mrs. Botsford go off exploring

TJ stands by the control panel and says OOOOOH, WHAT DOES THIS BUTTON DO?

Word Girl says NO, NO, DON'T PUSH THAT ONE!

He pushes the button. The spaceship lands in the hole with a loud crash [Music Plays]

TJ says HEH, UH... WHOOPS. MAYBE I SHOULDN'T TINKER WITH ANYMORE OF YOUR PROPERTY.

Word Girl looks annoyed and says YEAH, MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T.

TJ says AW, WHO AM I KIDDIN'! I CAN'T HELP MYSELF!

He runs around the spaceship and jumps on the trampoline WOO! WOO! WOO, HAHA!

Word Girl says HEY, DON'T DO THAT! OH, WHY NOT?

She gives in and jumps on the trampoline alongside TJ

The Narrator says AND SO, WORD GIRL MANAGED TO PROTECT THE PEACEFULNESS OF NATURE, KEEP HER SUPER SECRET SPACESHIP HIDEOUT A SECRET

An image shows Whammer sitting by the river’s edge looking sad The scene quickly changes to Word Girl, Bob, and TJ jumping on the trampoline

The Narrator continues AND ALMOST MANAGED TO KEEP TJ FROM TINKERING WITH HER PROPERTY. TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR MORE FUN AND ADVENTURE WITH WORD GIRL!